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"Look, Halle. I worked really hard with you for this audition and then for you to not even get in makes it a complete waste of my time. You were sliding again while you were singing; weren't you? That's why you didn't get in?"I nodded again."I told you not to do that!" she exclaimed exasperatedly. Then she sighed and rubbed her temples. "Look, I think you need to be punished for this. You can't just waste my time like that and expect to get away with it," she continued."What do you-" I stopped short, for she had pulled out a long, heavy looking yardstick."Um...what's that for?" I asked nervously, backing away."Take a wild guess," she said as if I were too stupid to realize what was about to happen. "Bend over the desk. Now," she said as she got up and walked over to the side of the desk I was standing on.I backed away. "No! No, please!" I begged. "Halle, right now, it's just going to be over your panties, but if you keep protesting, it'll be on the bare. Now, I say again...bend over,". I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.16. I disagree with Kay Jewellers. I would bet on any given Friday orSaturday night more kisses begin with Miller Light than Kay.17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front.21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty, but Jeans? Jeans never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.22. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on theDonkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet.
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