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I was wondering what was on his mind. He pulled out his phone from the breast pocket of his jacket and unlocked it. He tapped on an app and then showed it to me. If I am being honest, I knew what he was going to show me. It was my profile, even without the picture. To his credit, he blushed a little. I looked at him and smiled as if to say, “yeah, what about it?” He took a deep breath; I told him he was being awfully dramatic about it and to say whatever he had to say. I tried to say it in a way that would reassure him, but at that point, I really had no idea which way he was going to go.After a quick nod from him, he asked me if this was my first time on the app. I sighed and looked at him. I told him we both knew the answer to that question and that maybe we could skip the appetizers and move to the main course.He took a few swallows of his wine, his wedding band on his left hand. I smiled. “Are you, you know........." he started.I looked at him. “I’m not trying to make this more. Okay? Get up.”“Be sick.”“Come on Barb.” I said as I pulled her to her feet. I helped her stumble to the bathroom. “Be sick.” She warned.She was almost home, almost there, just about to the finish line, she was about to summit when the eruption took place. A stream of brandy, coffee, Saki, General Tso’s chicken, more Saki, mu Shu pork, assorted appetizers’, and two fortune cookies (I gave her mine) erupted from that pretty mouth like a fire hose spewing stomach acid and compost. The first burst was aimed in the general direction of the sink. The cabinets and mirror received the brunt of it. In her confusion she turned toward me and I got the second burst in the chest. I got her turned back to the toilet. She looked at like it was a life boat and fell to her knees in front of it. Unfortunately her aim had not improved and she puked all over the toilet seat. (Another argument for leaving the seat up!) and the lid. Her final effort landed a few tablespoons in the toilet.
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