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:)Already since I was a k** I had a fascination for penises. Watching my classmates in gym class or playing games. Real honest curiosity. Later came a certain shame, I come from quite a religious family and there was not a lot of room for free sexuality. Sexuality was something for that certain person you are going to marry. This got me always really afraid. I also turned more inward in puberty and became quite shy, having lots of hidden fantasies. I would sit a lot behing my laptop watching oral sex videos. I never really knew where it came from. I always had it. I always felt that have vaginal sex felt strange to me. As if that should be for loving only and that oral sex is more lust.When I was 15 orso I bought a dildo and this might sounds weird. I never used it on my pussy. Never even in the years later. It just doesn’t feel right. I wanted to feel how it would be to suck a man and masturbate. Every morning and evening I would put the dildo in my mouth and play with myself until. I just hoped that when we separated I'd be able to get back to my customary mindset.Yes, I was still going under the assumption that I'd drop them off on Prime and get sent to another system. I didn't want to assume otherwise; I'd be setting myself up for disappointment. It would hurt, I knew it would, but I couldn't stop what I was feeling for them.After eating, I went back to the bridge and did my checks. I settled in and did some reading, occasionally looking over monitors. A few hours later, I changed into some workout clothes, grabbed a bottle of water, and hit the gym. Since the attack back on the station the day before screwed up our plans, we'd missed the morning workout we'd planned on. I did a combination cardio and light workout and some time on the heavy bag.As I left, Mari was leading Anna and Katherine and headed into the gym. They asked when I wanted dinner and I told them whenever they were ready. After a shower I'd be on the bridge until then.I was hanging from a.
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