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Feeling guilty, she made me feel that I was deceiving her by lying to her, when I told her that I loved her, too, when I didn’t, even though, in hindsight, I did. Yet, I didn’t feel bad enough about lying to her not to take advantage of her sexually. Back then, unable to love anyone, when I didn’t even love myself, I couldn’t love her then in the way she loved me and in the way that I love her now. Too preoccupied by other women, too wild to give way to a rope lassoed around my neck, I needed to roam, run free, and go hog wild. With my sexual desire for her interfering with my love and romance, unable to see the real woman standing before me that she was, oblivious to the good woman she was inside, I only saw her in bits and pieces, tits, ass, pussy, hands, and mouth. Back then, with me being so immaturely young, my heart was a black hole and as empty as my head. With all the self-centeredness that I had for myself, I had no room in my heart to love her or anyone. Thinking with my. All three of my officers saluted me. They held the salute, watching me as I got to my feet. I straightened my back and returned the salute.“Carry on,” I said as I dropped the salute. Chaz and Kelsey immediately lowered their hands. They moved past me and headed for the door. Warren held his just a moment longer before dropping his salute.“I’ll back you up if Captain Prescott tries to cause a problem,” he said before turning and following the others out of the room.Lenore grabbed me as I started to turn. “Do we get to have all your attention tonight?” she asked.“I should prepare for tomorrow’s simulation,” I said.“You’ve done all you can for your crew,” Lenore snarled. She sounded exasperated. “There isn’t a single person on your crew who doesn’t know you have taken extra lessons and shorted yourself on sleep.”“I’m the captain,” I said calmly. “It’s expected of me.”“Ashley never expected you to all but ignore her for four weeks,” Lenore said firmly.“I do have a duty,” I replied. “For.
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