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" She looked puzzled. "Well, sorta."I grinned. "The English language has no gender-neutral pronoun." Well," she replied, "in all fairness to our ancestors, how often did they deal with insane psycho rapists transferring their consciousness into bodies of the opposite sex?"I nodded, and then, looking sideways at her, said, "All the time. It happens in Missouri all the time."Without missing a beat, she looked at me and said, "It does? Well, bite my lip!"I beamed at her. "You, my dear, are amazing." I started to head back, and then said, "Give me about thirty seconds before you come in, OK?"I paused at the threshold and thought about how to play this. For all Lauren's adaptability and smarts, I didn't see a credible good-cop, bad-cop scenario. As cliché as it is, interrogation methods like that work, which is undoubtedly why they become clichés.As I re-entered the cabin, I saw our prisoner had been trying to work her arms back and forth to loosen the tape. I chuckled and said, "You know. I still don't know how it happened, exactly. It was my invitation, to dinner if nothing else. Yes I found him beautiful but I didn't belive in our friendship and that was his fault. He said believing is just fooling yourself and I believed everything he said.I remember my family teasing me that night when I put on my third choice of shirts, the final decision a chest-hugging pink tee shirt with a low neck line. My friends and family laughed at how much I was obsessing over the way I look, something I NEVER do. And this was just dinner, supposedly. I had no other expectations, only fantasies that I never thought would come true. He was due to arrive in thirty minutes and I couldn't stop the jitters. I even tried drinking a beer and listening to soft music but nothing stopped the nerves. It was strange, because I was usually so comfortable with him but somehow knowing that he would be in my house, eating dinner, drinking wine and having fun with my friends and family made me feel more.
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