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All the children of the parish now attend the Methodist school, where not only are they tolerated whatever branch of the Christian religion their parents follow, but also pay less fees.So there you have the Rector of St Martin's at Market Laverton: a man who would cut off his nose to spite his face. The Reverend George Proctor had married his shy looking wife about four years ago, but whether that change in his circumstance had improved his temper, or his intelligence, I would not know.As I have already said the meals provided at the Rectory were of the finest quality, and of great quantity, as the Rector was a trencherman of some considerable appetite, and I found myself attending dinner there several times in a week. I often had to grit my teeth when the Rector started on his many tirades, and just waited for the food to arrive. Even he stopped talking when this manna from heaven appeared before us. The maid with the cast in her eye did the serving, and I was intrigued to see how,. But when the horse returned on the third day with another woman, the cowboy lost his temper and yelled “You stupid horse! I said ‘posse!’”What do you call 32 West Virginian women in one room?A full set of teeth.A farm boy accidentally overturned his wagonload of corn. The farmer who lived nearby heard the noise and yelled over to the boy, “Hey, Willis, forget your troubles. Come in and visit with us. I’ll help you get the wagon up later.”“That’s mighty nice of you,” Willis answered, “but I don’t think Pa would like me to.”“Aw, come on, boy,” the farmer insisted.“Well, OK,” the boy finally agreed, and added, “but Pa won’t like it.”After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. “I feel a lot better now, but I know Pa is going to be real upset.”“Don’t be foolish!” the neighbor said with a smile. “By the way, where is he?”“Under the wagon.”A man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and calls a vet.
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