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.' gambit? Nope, it's a Curse, not a superpower, you can't make it useful that easily. So yeah, I've very rarely been able to get laid in the past 12 years, and each one was basically a one-time-deal, except Candy, and Candy was: well... Let's not talk about Candy, to quote 'Hotel California' "Some Dance To Remember, Some Dance To Forget." Look, I DON'T want to talk about Candy! There are some things that are better left forgotten, dark chapters of my history I would rather be left on the cutting room floor of memory instead of endlessly dredged up and played back like some kind of corpse trial of my mistakes and failures of judgment! Can we please just move on? Okay, Thank you. As I was saying, I've been without anyone to have sex with for months. Everyone I know are either drunks, former drunks, in a relationship already, professional associates, or some combination of the above, and NO ONE wants to date a guy that both A: gets them plastered when they kiss, and B: then can't fuck. When Barry got in and sat between us, I could see he was uncomfortable with me being there. He didn't know where to put his hands and sat stiffly, trying to keep his legs from touching mine or Candy's. I patted his thigh and said, "Hey, relax. I won't bite." He relaxed a bit.I gave him the same speech I gave Candy, and he relaxed a bit more. I could see he was still confused. He needed more relaxing, so I let my hand rest on his thigh as I drove and offered more of an explanation.I said, "I fought hard for Candy to have the right to date. You two should be alone so you can get better acquainted. I really do wish you'd pretend I wasn't here. I know what goes on with teen dates. I was a teenager myself once. I won't say a thing, no matter what happens on this date." I squeezed his leg, trying to pass emphasis on the what.He looked to me as if to say, "Lady, your what and my what are two totally different whats. I want what your daughter has between her legs. I want to shove my cock so.
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