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After both suffering from depression for a while, me and the missus were going to commit suicide together yesterday.Strangely enough, however, once she killed herself I started to feel a lot better.So I thought - sod it, I’ll soldier on.I woke up this morning at 8 and could sense something was wrong.I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing!I panicked. I didn’t know what to do.Then I remembered the local cafe serves breakfast until 11.30.Got caught having a pee in the local swimming pool today.The lifeguard shouted at me so loud I nearly fell in.I woke to go to the toilet in the middle of the night and noticed a burglar sneaking through next door’s garden.Suddenly my neighbour came from nowhere and smacked him over the head with a shovel killing him instantly.He then began to dig a grave with the shovel.Astonished, I got back into bed.My wife said “Darling, you’re shaking, what is it?”“You’ll never believe what I’ve just seen!” I said, “That. She took back the phone gazing at it, smiling big. It was so pretty. A womans sexiest look it a real smile, coming from her soul. Sexier than any duck face will do. So do you not enjoy your job now? No, I mean the girls are great, lots of friends (stripper friends? I need to go to one of her birthday parties), and the money is great, but the hours are late and, well, I am tired of dressing like that for work. I dont even dress that way alone . . . I am pretty sure my parents wouldnt approve either. She trailed off a bit. Well parents can be a lot more understanding than you think. Think of how much you love your son. That love only grows as they become people. I dont know. I cant . . . .I cant talk to them. My dad died of cancer when I was 14. And my mom died when I was 19, just after Julius was born. She got cancer too. A different kind. Wow Angie, thats terrible. I am so sorry. Did they have life insurance? No, we didnt have a lot of money, especially after dads treatment. His.
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