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I rang the ornate ancient bell, luckily being able to shelter under the classic arched porch. “Yeeeess?” drawled the lady’s cultured, deep voice, looking at my wet bedraggled state through piercing ice blue eye, behind ornate off white business style spectacles. “Er ... thought I’d better tell someone, the fence is broken ... down there,” I waved at the footpath. “Your cow had escaped but I got her back and patched the fence but it won’t last long...” “What Daisy? Oh no, was she OK?” “Yeah, what I could see she was fine, but you know, the weather, I didn’t fully examine her, well I don’t know much about cows...” “Oh thank god,” the lady gasped, with hidden reservations. “I’ll get Carl ... Oh no he’s at market with Benny, Oh dear, but thank you thank you.”Her haughty, starchy attitude had frozen quickly and I guess it was because I’d given her bad news about her obviously much loved bovine. “Who are you anyway?” she challenged, the upper crust inner person re-emerging. “Mick, Carl’s. "You should know," I stammered trying to assert myself and having atough time because I kept feeling the need to check my dress and besure it wasn't slipping down, "I don't have any desire to be with men.I mean if I really were a girl I think I would probably be a lesbian."A bit of nervous laughter escaped."Relax," Dave grinned. "I don't have any interest in doing anything toyou. And if you do relax, I think we might really have a good evening."You really do look amazing," he shook his head and drank more of hiswine then looked around. "I think we are going to need more winethough. We are going to be out before we get to dinner." Well, I can't go to the store," I protested."Why not?" Dave asked. "You and Cheryl could take a ride and get somemore. I can get the dinner cooked while you are gone." How about because it would take me too long to change and clean allthis off my face," I was getting exasperated. "And if you think I wouldgo like this, I would remind you I don't have any.
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