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Marv's was a slightly run-down topless bar on the outskirts of downtown; one of the old-style places with aged wood and old beer signs where the girls (okay, the women) came from surrounding neighborhoods. Nowadays they had to come from farther away - downtown was going downhill - but the place still had that comfortable feel. Nobody had actually seen Marv for years; the representative of management was the bartender and bouncer, Big Red.Craig liked the atmosphere. The dancers weren't stick figure Barbies but real women, peeling and posing for the tips and the thrill, not to make any kind of decent money from it. You wouldn't think there would be many women interested, but Marv's Place had four dancers covering every three-hour shift, twenty-one hours a day. Some of them danced in a bikini, most went down to panties or a g-string. A few would get adventurous sometimes and go all the way, but only if the crowd was down to just regulars.You knew you were a regular if Big Red greeted you. Her eyes bulged when she saw the overabundance of food on the table: two hams, a fifty-gallon drum of mashed potatoes, deviled eggs, three casseroles, and enough rolls to force Poppin' Fresh to take a paternity test. Plus a gravy boat the size of the naval vessels (or wessels, if you're Chekov from Star Trek) used in "Dunkirk."As we waited to be seated, my nephew came to me, glanced Katrina up and down and, "Wink, wink, nudge, nudge... You did alright for yourself, Auntie Em." Grinning insanely, he continued his stand up act, "Did you see the cake Mom picked out for you?" Then leading me to a large sheet cake. "See, it looks like a carpet... carpet muncher, get it?"Subtlety has never been my big sis's best asset. We finally sat. I was still very worried about a faux pas from my loving nutritionist. Then it happened!As I began pouring two gallons of gravy (as lumpy as one of the Three Stooges skulls) over five pounds of lumpier mashed potatoes, she could remain silent no longer. "Do.
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