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Finally I beganunpacking all bags and trying again every piece of clothe I bought. Idressed the best I could and went from the sleeping room to the toiletteto see myself in that full body mirror each time. My past experiencesdressing in my sister's clothes came to my memory, only now every pieceof cloth fits perfectly in my curves. When I finished with the dressing,I got the makeup stuff, went to the toilette and tried to apply myself.Of course I did a bad job, I had no idea on how to do it. I decided toask Sara to teach me how to use it. She is the only one I can trust withmy secret.Then I started writing this journal. I need to put on paper what bothersme. First, as I already wrote before, I felt I should not be socomfortable with my situation as I was. After all, from my ownperspective, "24 hours ago" I was a male and, except for those isolatedcrossdressing experiences of the past I remember being happy as anheterosexual male. So how can I feel so comfortable with the idea. He was so handsome, yet so confined. I yelled out hello, and many people answered, but he was not one of them. My heart dropped a little but I continued staring, daydreaming about us. Who was he?After it came to my attention that a lot of people noticed me staring at him I hesitantly looked away, but he was never far from my mind. After believing I was a lesbian for a year then for him to come into my life, I seriously considered my sanity at the time. Could I be bi? No. Not in this world. I don’t have anything against bi-sexual people; it just didn’t seem to fit in with who I am. He saw me looking at him on multiple occasions. I didn’t mind. He smiled back when he saw me go bright red after being caught. I wished I wasn’t in jeans and a long-sleeved shirt. I made a mental note to wear a skimpier outfit next time I saw him. I never thought I could make so much trouble over one guy. Little did I know he was just the starting point. As our activities started I got to here his voice for.
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