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"I'd end up on charges of man handling, if not man slaughter." She was always the violent one," Alf told Mr. Douglas."Watch it! I'm also a carpenter; there's always the mandrill!" This has gone on far too long," Oliver Douglas said. "Wrap this up, so I can change into something else!" Why? I think you look handsome," Alf told him."There's another reason I can't be your maid, Mrs. Douglas. You don't have a proper maid's uniform." Ose! That's rights! We had to flee from the scandal so quicksly, all we grabbed from Manhattan was butler's uniforms!" Lisa realized."What scandal!!?! And what butler?!! We've never had a butler!" Oliver Douglas insisted."Yes, we have! We've always had butlers!" Lisa insisted. "And they all wear whites caps and aprons, short black dresses with whites frilly petticoats, garters belts and black hose, with black heels." That's a maids uniform!!" Why would a woman want to wear men's clothes!?!!" Ralph told him. "No wonder you have a hard time keeping maids! Talk. 'A man is recovering from surgery when the Surgical Nurse appears and asks him how he is feeling.'I'm O. K. But I didn't like the four letter-words the doctor used in surgery, ' he answered.'What did he say, ' asked the nurse.'Oops!'While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's advice.'What do you think?' I asked. 'Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?''Better get a bikini, ' he replied. 'You'd never get it all in one.'He's still in intensive care.The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance.The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she's there.'This one is compliments of Gary:3 HillbilliesThree Hillbillies are sittin' on a porch shootin' the bull.1st.
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