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While the day draws to its hectic close, your hand, almost like it has a life of its own, keeps checking your phone for messages, only to have it mock you with its colourfully barren display. Finally you are able to leave the office. It is nearly 9pm as you make your way to the tube, feeling exhausted, despondent, disappointed. Like a conveyor belt of revellers, the car is busy dispersing people throughout town on their way to a night out, dressed to impress and smiling at the prospect of the next few hours. You find their excitement stifling and quite annoying. Your mind wanders, trying to imagine how the evening might have turned out. Instead you force yourself to think of the hot shower and bottle of Italian red waiting to offer you a modicum of comfort and consolation. Ascending from the tube, your sensible heels click on the pavement as the cold night air assaults you, jolting you from your reverie and firmly urging you to walk faster. As you pick up the pace, thoughts turning. "You know what I did! I fasted and restricted my fluid intake for a day orso before…" "So you never used a catheter then?" "No I bloody didn't! That's almost as bad as an enema!" His smile was huge and expansive. "I think she's already had one of them!" Sheila's eyes grew even wider. " AndI also think that the vibrator in her, er, front has probably been hollowedout to allow for a tube to pass through it and in turn allow her to, erm, makewater." "You mean she's been catheterised?" He grinned in triumph. "Yup! And that "tail" you're currently holding in your hand probably feelswarm because it's conducting the waste away and into a receptacle in the bottomof the box." Sheila stood motionless for a few seconds regarding him blankly, and thenshe looked first at the creature and then at the "tail". When she did finallyspeak it was slow and halting. "So this …"THING" …is full of …" He nodded sagely. "…Urine!" He nodded for a third time and with a certain amount ofsatisfaction. It had.
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