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“I don’t recall it included molesting children,” said Joe.“I guess it’s your ass. Or theirs.”“Jesus,” said Joanne. “Yeah, Trevor fucked men for a living. But he’s a genuinely nice guy.”“Whatever.”“You know I’m gay,” Li chipped in, beginning their conversation.“Not exclusively.”“No, but my auntie is. And she’s taken care of kids all her life. Do you think they were ever in danger?”“I don’t know. Probably not.”“Auntie Li, and yes I was named for her. Prophetically. She’s the old black sheep and I’m the new one. But that’s for another time. She’s not interested in little girls. Not that way. She’d rather be with big ladies,” Li laughed. “And her best friend, also gay, and male, also teaches little kids. The families trust him. Because he cares about his little pupils, but likes big tough men for sex. One actually, and they’ve been together forever. There’s a difference you know, being gay and being a pederast.”“Is there?”“Yes. Have you known any gay men.”“I’ve known some queens.”“You. I’m sure that your ladies will enjoy them.”Red faced, Ed went over to the counter and paid for his purchases. As the clerk rang up the strap-ons, she said, “You’ll need some lube to go with these.”Returning to the wall, Ed took two tubes of lube. At the register, the bored clerk rang up the rest of the purchases. Ed paid for the purchases, asking that the goods be put in two separate bags. The clerk looked at him and put everything in a single bag, able to tell that Ed was from out of town and there was no chance of repeat business.Dissatisfied with the service, Ed was tempted to ask for his money back. Looking at the bored clerk and his audience, Ed decided a more appropriate parting shot was required. In a droll voice, he asked, “Where did you learn to count?”The clerk looked up at him in surprise and said, “Why?”Ed answered, “Because most people can count to ten because they have ten fingers. I guess you’ve been given the finger by your customers so many times that you can only.
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