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Oh no. We see our lives as something to be endured, gotten through, to get even with. The path of most people’s lives, leaves a trail of unopened doors, behind which lay the magic of life never released because of our fear. My life was easy in comparison to most… up until the summer I have described in the previous volume of my tale. Easy isn’t even the right word for it. Blessed is a better one. By the end of that summer I thought I knew true pain. The loss of Sasha. The loss of my child. The loss of my path. These losses brought me pain the likes of which I had never known existed, let alone felt. All that pain provided me with a new respect for fear. As with everyone, I had felt fear in the past. But this new fear, brought on by actual loss, actual pain… this was fear on steroids. I let it consume me for a time. I almost let it take me. My fear of death palled in comparison to the looming shadow of my fear of living. Aoife saved me that night on my knees, next to the bed Sasha. 4. to make sure everyone went through with it, we would all do it at the same time in front of each other.This variation of the game intrigued me; because this was the first time with this group of people. There were counted out to be sixteen sets of keys, but eighteen girls who would draw. So Stella announced two sets of girls will go with two randomly drawn key owners...these were determined randomly by a number count. Luckily I was not one of them. I am hoping at this time to get Bills keys; but it turned out he got the two girls on the first draw...damn!!!As luck would have it, I had to wait until last to draw from the bowl. No real challenge as everyone was paired up by this time. Some of them were already going for it, getting undressed, kissing and caressing each other. Right now, I was getting pretty nervous, and was not sure i could go through with it after all. Bill just looked at me and nodded, as if to say "You can do it wren." He then turned his attention back to the two.
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