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As Rhee said, nothing significantly different will happen tonight. Well, that’s not quite true. Nothing particularly physically significant will happen. It seems, despite my sexual proclivity leaning toward the lesbian side of the spectrum, this “losing virginity” thing has a stronger hold on my psyche than I imagined. Much stronger. I pondered that, remembering aspects of all of the sex I’ve had, often with fingers inside me ... fingers of five other people, one of whom is the man I hope to make love with tonight.That last caused me to think. “Is it just the ‘scheduled’ aspect of it,” I wondered, that the act was not going to take place organically, a result of an otherwise not-so-exceptional evening with someone I love. Would I not be nervous if I didn’t “know” what was going to happen, what was “scheduled” to happen?Rhee was so right. Just go to dinner with Dad, like I have done so many times before. Just hang out with the coolest, most wonderful dad on the planet. I nodded my. She tried to walk around me, her head faced the carpet. "Not right now, okay honey?" No, it's not okay. We have to talk." Seeing my once proud and feisty mother shy away from me like I were a villain, shamed me. Of course, she was thinking the villain was her."Sit down mother." I took her arm and slightly tugged her towards the couch.She suddenly nodded and actually looked me in the eye. "I guess you're right. Thanks." She attempted a smile. She turned and headed for the far cushion.Her subordination to my command was an incredible turn on, but I had prepared well. In my left hand I cradled a thorny thistle pod. I clenched it and clenched my teeth in response. My cock demurred to the sudden distraction of pain, barely. I sat on the couch cushion farthest from my mother."Honey?" Mom tilted her head at my pained expression."This is going to sound..." I began, stalled, gulped, and proceeded. "This is going to sound like total horseshit, but before you get up and walk away, I'm going to.
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