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With all the hype how could you not go.A very boring hour long talk about the future and humanities role in shaping the earth was followed by a twenty minute session where they hooked you up to a computer by little stick on wires and asked a ton of seemingly useless questions, such as “If you witnessed a child drop sticky candy would you a. Dust it off and tell them it was fine, b. Buy them a new one, c. Laugh, or d. Not care, walk away.” Or even better, just, “Pink or black?” That isn't even a question.Once that was all over you had to fill out a paper describing in great detail your dream new self, or simply marking the box, same as now, plus the, “Would you change anything?” Question. Finally they put that all in a little plastic box and said they would call you if any more was needed and send you updates every year on their progress.Six months later they company went bankrupt and became a funny joke.10 years later the new plague struck and wiped half the people on the planet out. “Before we start Dennis please understand that part of this exercise is to show the woman (my patient) that you fancy her, and sitting there with your hands in your lap is not the way I would like you to do it – understand?” “Yes” I said removing my hands revealing my semi hard state. They both stared at my lap with Sam the first to speak “God Dennis that looks impressive may I ask how big you are?” “11.5 inches when I last measured” I said “And girth?” said Amanda “5.5 inches – is that a problem?” “Er no not at all” said Sam “If things happen that you are unhappy with Dennis then just say and we will stop” I nodded and she said “now lets begin.”Sam spoke to Amanda as if she were a patient and introduced me to her saying that if she got uncomfortable with my presence then I would be asked to leave. They started to talk and it appeared a very well rehearsed roll play with Amanda seeming distraught because she thought that no man would ever want her. Sam asked my opinion and I told.
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