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’ ‘No, it’s crumbed squid rings, it is not calamari.’ ‘Yeah it’s squid, that’s calamari, and it’s been minced and shaped into a ring and crumbed, therefore it’s crumbed calamari.’ I pushed the plate away from me in disgust. ‘Do you want it or not?’ ‘I wouldn’t feed this to my cat.’ I told her so she grabbed the plate and started to walk away. ‘Hang on, I want to order something else, something that I can eat.’ ‘Suit yourself but you’re going to have to pay for this.’ ‘You’re kidding, I pay for it and you take it back to the kitchen and eat it.’ ‘What makes you think I’d eat it? What do you want?’ ‘You’d better get me a steak and I want it rare and none of that packet pepper sauce either.’ ‘Would you like to come out to the kitchen and cook it yourself? Shee, talk about fussy, anyone would think you’re in a fancy city restaurant the way you carry on.’ She shuffled off to get my steak. She returned and shoved the plate in front of me with a slab of steak on it. ‘The chef told me to tell. He kissed my neck.I'm sure that's an important part of the technique, I just can't explain why.He held my left hand on a halved pepper, and moved my right hand, the one holding the large vegetable knife, to cut it into strips. He had my left hand turn the strips ninety degrees. Then, he nibbled my ear."Never try to cut anything while you're doing this," he said.He gave me a moment to recover and then placed the tip of the knife on the cutting board.We slashed the blade down without moving the tip. He advanced my left hand to move the strips under the knife and slashed down again. Suddenly, we were done."That took like two seconds," I said."How long is it supposed to take?" Longer."Jeff released my hands and put his hands on my hips. He pulled me tight against him. Then he put his arms around my waist and squeezed."What are you trying to do" I asked."Hold you closer."Was he setting this up on purpose?"If you hold me any closer, I'll be in back of you," I said, without the cigar and.
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