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”;At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee : “Invite us to your next blowout.”;On an Electrician’s truck: “Let us remove your shorts.”;In a Non-smoking Area: “If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action.”;On a Maternity Room door: “Push. Push. Push.”;At a Car Dealership: “The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.”;Outside a Muffler Shop: “No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”;In a Veterinarian’s waiting room: “Be back in 5 minutes. Sit ... Stay”;At the Electric Company: “We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time. However, if you don’t, YOU will be de-lighted.”;In a Restaurant window: “Don’t stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.”;In the front yard of a Funeral Home: “Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”;At a Propane Filling Station: “Thank Heaven for little grills.”;In a Chicago Radiator Shop: “Best place in town to take a leak...”;And the best one for last... ; Sign on the back of another Septic Tank. Reena ye sab sun kr chonk gai.Wo mere kaan mein boli ki yaar pagal ho gaye ho kya?Mere hubby ke samne ye sab kyun bol rahe ho?Raj-yaar ab daro mat…Tu meri hai….Manoj-bas yaar tum pura khyal rakho…Reena ab tumhare hawale hi hai…Tum jab tak chaho yahan raho….Reena se baat krwao…Reena ko phone diya.Manoj-kaisi ho…Ab to tumhari problem dur ho gai…Raj tumhara khoob khyal rakhega…Reena-aaahhh….Raj to pura khyal rakhta hai…Din raat apne paas hi rakhta hai…Manoj-good…Tum enjoy karo…Raj bahut achchha ladka hai….Raj-yaar…Manoj…Abhi reena ko maze dene wala hun…Aao reena…Kapde khol kr tyar ho jao…Aaj to khoob maze aana wala hai..Tumhare hubby ki bhi permission mil gai…Manoj-aah…Good phone pr sab sun sunna chahta hun…Speker on kr do…Raj-aaah…Reena darling aao…Reena kapde khol chuki thi.Raj-aaaah…Reena darling…Kapde khol do…Reena-ooohhh darling…Sab khool dungi…Ooohh..Ye lo…Raj-aaah..Tere dono ball se khelne de mujhe…Meri reena…Aaah..Bade mast boob h tere…Aaahh….Reena-aaahhh…Raj…Plz…Aaahh…Aaram se.
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Of course, he made a pass at me and I in a moment of weakness submitted to his persistence and bent over his desk to give him a nice diddle of my bum and other goodies as he was quite polite and had a good attitude about my being only half his age and still naïve enough to think I might get more information with honey instead of a negative attitude.He thanked me most profusely and told me that his communication section had just learned that the Chinese Embassy had been hit by an American Cruise missile supposedly by accident but it was not near the intended target which was the Serbian intelligence building which was several miles away.He was nice enough to give me some photos taken by a local contract worker of the destruction and also an internal report of the collateral damage caused by the errant missile. I was able to use their sat line to file my report with the head office and I promised him to give him a second round at my bottom later that night. Of course, I had no intention.

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