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First theteasing about dating Matt, then getting caught going out for a smoke byAngela, then the 'girl to girl' talk from her mother, and finally, allof the football wives trying to set him up with Matt at the AmericanCancer Society Gala Ball.Finally, all of that was behind him. Jordan was now able to just sip hispunch, nibble on some of the excellent Tex-Mex, and enjoy the party.And what was amazing is that people would randomly just sit down to talkto him!Even more amazing was how everyone just loved that Jordan knew somethingabout sports and football in particular. He could make the most innocentcomments and suddenly he was engaged in lengthy conversations aboutstrategy and plays.For example, Jordan asked Emmitt about the difference between the 4-3defense and the 3-4 defense and how they were handled by the Cardinalsoffensive line. Suddenly, Emmitt had gathered the entire offensive lineand then assembled the coaches and other players to give him an actuallife-size, slow-motion. The following is a list of why I didn’t succeed more often:We will wake the kids - 54 timesIt’s too late - 15 timesI’m too tired - 42 timesIt’s too early - 12 timesIt’s too hot - 18 timesPretending to be asleep - 31 timesThe neighbors will hear - 9 timesHeadache or backache - 26 timesSunburn - 10 timesYour mother will hear us - 9 timesNot in the mood - 21 timesWatching the late show - 17 timesToo sore - 26 timesNew hairdo - 6 timesWrong time of the month - 14 timesYou had to go to the bathroom - 19 timesOf the 36 times that I DID succeed, the result was not always satisfying because 6 times you just laid there, 8 times you reminded me that there was a crack in the ceiling, 4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with, 7 times I had to wake you up to tell you I was finished, and once I was afraid that I had hurt you because you started thrashing around and breathing heavy. Let’s try to improve this, shall we??Love, Your HubbyTo My Dearest Husband,I think things are a little.
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