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My jaws fell to the ground a girl around 18 or 19 having such an erotic figures anybody could fall for her. This thought suddenly struck my mind what if she had a boyfriend??? What if she got laid already???oh all that feeling suddenly where thrashed out. My uncle had two son and a daughter. An elder daughter who was just a month younger to me. My best friend her name was Palak. I used to share every stuff of my life with her my first crush everything. I asked her about that girl. She then confirmed her name that she was Mili my dream girl. I asked her if she could talk about me to her telling her that I m interested in her. She accepted the proposal and went to her house that evening. She went back and told me that Mili was not interested in me. I got stuck how can a girl that too a village girl can reject a guy who is tall, muscular, and meanwhile handsome. I was in a situation of nowhere to go.After that I developed a stiff disliking towards her, was a bit sad which let Palak come. Seeing me degrading my self, my vows, my Order. I knew the difference between masturbation and this lustful, gut drenching sexual hunger I had. Masturbation is something to help with the strain and stress and the natural sexual desires we all have once and a while. What I have is not normal; it is not the natural sexual desires. And for that I am ashamed. After I climax, I want to hide, to hang my head in shame. I vowed to never have sex. Yet, I long for the feel of it, I long for the moment I will ever experience what it will be to have sex with a man.Hear that? I guess I feel it is going to happen. Not that it is a fantasy, not that it is something that could possibly happen. No, I am talking as though I know it is going to happen. On top of that I am thinking like that horny young wife, one man will never be enough. I look at my self in the mirror. What I see makes me sick. I see this beautiful Nun; with her Habit tied around her waist holding two coke bottles deep inside of her..
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