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Took an overdose.” He stood and started to walk away from me. My heart leapt into my throat. “You can’t blame yourself for that.” “Oh yes I can,” he said. I darted in front of him. “Well you shouldn’t.” The moonlight fell on his face in such a way that his eyes were in shadow, and all I could see were two tiny white reflections. “Let me go,” he said, stepping round me. I turned and watched his back as he walked away down the path. “Where are you going?” “I don’t want to go on like this.” I hurried after him and grabbed his arm. “No! Don’t.” “Why not?” “Because! She wouldn’t have wanted that, would she?” “She doesn’t want anything now.” He pulled his arm free and carried on. I got in front of him, barring his way. “Okay!” I said. “So you feel bad. That’s normal. Get drunk, get laid, get in a fight and get arrested, whatever, but don’t kill yourself.” He made to push past me again and I grabbed his shoulders and kissed him. I don’t know what made me do it. Desperation, maybe.. Patrice began planning our strategy. It was a little weird how she suddenly seemed so detached from the guy who held her heart just a few days ago, the guy she had willingly surrendered her virginity to only a few months before."I'll write him and tell him that it is just not working out for us. I'll let him off the hook so he will feel free to pursue you." Do you think that will work?" I asked, hopefully. I wanted Tim so desperately that I was overlooking things that should have put up alarms."He knows how difficult long distance relationships are. He has been hinting in his letters that it isn't going to work for us. I've been ignoring it, but now I'll write back and agree. If I have to, I'll even tell him that I met someone else."Then Patrice looked very serious. She leaned forward and spoke directly to my face. "You have to make this work. I want your solemn promise that you will do whatever you have to so Tim is happy. Will you do that for me?"I thought about her words. I didn't.
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