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FLORIDA OR MOONTwo blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away ... Florida or the moon?" The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida?"CARTROUBLEA blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.She says, "What's the story?"He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"SPEEDING TICKETA police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together.Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"RIVER WALKThere's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?"The second blonde looks up the river then down the. "I said "That's sexual harassment."Linda put her hand up and asked me to let her finish. "When I came home that night I came to bed early and thought about what he said all night. At first I thought I should turn him in for sexual harassment but then realized I had not proof. It was my word against his and it was possible that I misunderstood him. I decided not to mention anything to you because I didn't want to upset you. I thought I could handle it myself. I decided to ask for another meeting with Jim the next day to get this straightened out. At work the next morning I called Jim's secretary and asked if I could get an appointment she said she would ask him to see when he might be free. Ten minutes later I was on my way to his office. When I stepped into his office Jim said I was hoping I would see you today. I look at Jim and asked just what he meant by using my special attributes to help get myself promoted. Jim said 'Okay here it is. On paper you look just like any of the other.
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