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I had attempted suicide twice and was seeing a therapist, taking anti-depressants daily and going to sex addiction group meetings. I was losing weight and looking very old now for a woman that was only 40, I looked 60. I didn’t care anymore, I wanted to die. Al and Julie visited with me weekly and tried to snap me out of the funk I was in. Without my boys I didn’t have the will to live anymore. I was responsible for the deaths of 10 young men and it ate at my very soul. Now on the anniversary of Robert’s death I am looking at the letter I got in today’s mail. Those three haunting words ‘Wait For It.’ I am waiting for it and I am welcoming it when it comes. My will is written and at the lawyer’s office, my burial expenses are paid off. I called Al and Julie when I got the letter and told them good bye and asked them to ask my son’s to forgive me please and asked for theirs too. They both gave me theirs and I hung up the phone. I am sitting in front of a big picture window while typing. I could almost feel my rim burst as his glans penetrated my tube and forced me open. I let out a stifled scream, but he kept coming in, further and further, thrusting and thrusting, until his glans was well past the rim and seemed to be deep in my belly."That's all right now" he said, releasing my face, "You have surrendered your virginity to me and from now on you will be rewarded with beautiful feelings every time you have a lover whose big hard penis penetrates your softness and you let him fuck you until you receive his seed. But now, so that you will for ever be MY virgin, I must take your lovely young body completely, fuck your soft bum deeply and then shoot my hot sticky sperm as deep as I can inside your bowels."He lay on me and, kissing my neck and sucking at my shoulders, he started to move in and out of me gently. I tried to relax, but this was difficult as my rim was really sore, but I did start to feel a pleasure inside my arse, and especially when he started going at me.
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