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She had a sparky personality, joining in with the banter that flew around the room, nevertheless, my colleagues seemed quite protective towards her. We got on well, and after a few days, as we were on the same lunch rota, we tended to go together to the university refectory for our meal. Everyone in the place seemed to know Zöe, and she was very popular. The end of my second week in the office was our monthly pay day, and I found that the team usually went to a nearby pub together after work. Zöe and I got there a few minutes before the others. It was quite early in the evening, and the place was quiet. As we entered, the barman, a Jamaican complete with modest dreadlocks and Bob Marley stubble, turned and called out, ‘Hello short stuff. You want your usual?’ I was briefly surprised at what I took to be an offensive remark, but Zöe grinned and replied, ‘Hi long shanks, this is my new friend, Adam.’ Clearly these were the usual greetings between the two. A couple of the regulars. I’m sure he didn’t realize it.” “Yes. You’ve mentioned that before.” Replied Jack softly “I can’t blame him for having an ugly penis, but, I mean, limburger is a good cheese if you like limburger, and then maybe you might like the smell of limburger cheese, but a man’s penis shouldn’t smell like limburger cheese. I suppose you could say that a guy’s dick shouldn’t smell like a blueberry muffin, but a blueberry muffin is a pleasant smell that can be appreciated as a pleasant scent on its own. You can’t say that about limburger. Have you ever seen a limburger scented candle? I’ve actually seen a “blueberry muffin” scented candle. I’ve never seen a “limburger” scented candle. I’ve never seen an “ammonia” or “old sweat socks” scented candle either.” Said Jen “Anyhow, when can you be here to give my snapper a sniff?” “I’ll be there in an hour” said Jack “See you then.” “Ok thanks” said Jen. Jack hung up, itched his psoriasis elbow and thought about Jen. He wondered if Jen was a.
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