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The afterlifeAn older Sun City couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other of the afterlife. Their biggest fear was that there was no afterlife.After a long life, the husband was the first to go, and true to his word, he made contact, “Mary ... Mary...”“Is that you, Fred?”“Yes, I’ve come back like we agreed.”“What’s it like?”“Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast, off to the golf course, I have sex. I bathe in the sun, then I have sex twice. I have lunch, another romp around the golf course, then sex pretty much all afternoon. After supper, golf course again. Then I have sex until late at night. The next day it starts again.”“Oh, Fred, you surely must be in heaven.”“Not exactly, I’m a rabbit on a golf course in Des Moines, Iowa.”Lexus LS400A woman bought a new Lexus LS 400. She returned it to the dealer the next day, complaining that she couldn’t figure out how the radio worked. The salesman explained that the radio was voice. Yeah maybe you might have fun with some sub tendencies but I can’t see you sinking into it. When I was her slave, I knew I didn’t have to worry about a thing. There was a weird kind of freedom in letting everything go... Everything — I let the world go. I can’t see you doing that.”“Is that why you got on with Candy? Seeing something in her you identified with?”“I’m not an intellectual Andy; how the fuck would I know? It could be what you say, or maybe I recognised a randy slut, or maybe it was seeing her shamelessly naked that day.”Andy laughed. “Yeah, I get it, I think too much, I know I do, but that’s how I survive. What she got up to would have destroyed a lot of men. Other guys would have kicked her out the first time. It hurt me when she sprang it on me, more than she realised, more than I let her see. It did make me think, and thinking got me through.”“It’s part of why she loves you.”“What was it you said a minute ago? Shamelessly naked? What did you mean?”“I told you we met.
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