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"I'll let you practice on my bra before you try yours!"Shortly they were in the bathroom, where Rose sat him down. "Nice legs, Trace. You're going to look swell in stockings!" She started to roll a gelatinous pink goop on his legs."Aaaagggghhh! That's cold!" "My God, just wait until it snows around here if you think that's cold! I'll warm it up for my poor little girlfriend."She filled the sink with warm water and floated the bottle in it."For someone born and raised in the Northeast you sure do have a problem with the cold! Am I going to have to bundle you up like Charlie Brown this winter and get you a guide dog so you can see where you're going under all those layers?" I'll have you know I was born and raised in Buffalo, snow capitol of the news networks! I was not, however, born in a barn. I was raised in a centrally heated, thermostatically controlled home. When I am not out camping and freezing myself for pleasure I revert to 100 percent pure wimp, expecting to be coddled in. ]Hello, Lynn.LYNN: Hello, Brian.ME: [Aside.] I wonder if she'll sleep with me. [To Lynn.] I really appreciate you helping out.LYNN: You're welcome, I think.ME: [Aside.] She'd look great naked. [To Lynn.] This is really just going to be a normal conversation between two people who have just met. [Aside.] And want to get out of here so they can screw.LYNN: Is that really going on in your head?!ME: [Aside.] Are her nipples getting hard? [To Lynn, ignoring her question.] What's your major, Lynn?LYNN: History and Economics.ME: [Aside] With a minor in blowjobs. Oh please! [To Lynn.] I was told once that history majors mostly taught high school history so they could coach football. Are you into sports?LYNN: Not really. I plan to go into politics after I go to law school.ME: [Aside.] Oh shit! She's going to sue me. I'm really going to get screwed. I hope. [To Lynn.] A friend of mine once interviewed a future President of the United States. I hope I'll be able to say the same.LYNN: I hope so.
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