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You won't believe this shit dude, but it's true, I swear." Ian looked straight into my eyes with a look of compassion."You're pregnant aren't you?"You are such an asshole," I joked, "but seriously, you won't believe what I've gone through this morning." So you're not pregnant?" he continued, "You know I was starting to wonder with that ever-extending belly of yours." Ian smiled wide. "You've been smoking too much. Those munchies are gonna catch up to you, fatty." This had been an ongoing joke of his. My old body weighed 160 lbs. I was, if anything, under my ideal bodyweight but Ian always called me fat and shit. It never really bothered me though. In fact, I thought it was pretty funny. He continued. "Oh yeah," he said as he extended his arms and brought them in again for a flex, " ... you only wish you could have a body like mine." He flexed his biceps and reached his head over and kissed one. Why do football players and flaming arrogance seem to go hand-in-hand?"You're a total. I mean... I would never... It -- it just would not be right." Straw Head was horrified at the thought."Would you give it to a man if your father told you to?" Hunts Buffaloasked. "Or if I did?" I... I suppose I would have to," Straw Head said. "But it stillseems... wrong." How do we know that he is not lying?" Red Elk snorted. "For that matter, how do we know that this potion of his really even works as he told Dog Yelping?"Dog Yelping stiffened. "Because he is my son, and I say that he does not lie." If you say it, Dog Yelping," Hunts Buffalo said, "then it is so." Heturned to Straw Head. "You may keep the potion. Learn what you can from it, but be very careful." He thought for a moment. "And do not tell our guests of it." Guests," Straw Head asked.Dog Yelping answered. "In two days, the chief of the Iron Rocks Band of the People will be in our camp. I have word that they are camped at the mud flats this night. Our two tribes have argued over hunting lands. Their chief comes to talk.
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