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I took a deep breath, said, “OK, Here goes, 1. You have a great sense of humor. Men love that. 2. You have a beautiful smile, We love that too 3. You’re Smart; own your own business 4. You just exude your sexuality without trying 5. You have a body that just excites the hell out of me!”SHIT, I didn’t mean to say that, now she is going to be pissed at me, but instead she smiled at me with those deep dark eyes, melting me like dark eyes do. “Do I really excite you? Overweight as I am? I’m old enough to be Your, uh, older sister!” She said with a smile. I could only nod yes.“What excites you about me?” I reminded her about the Don’t ask me, I wont lie, thing, then told her everything I had thought about her for the last year I had been delivering to her office. The way she held herself proud, the way her body was, her large breasts and the way her ass stood out high even though she was large, but mainly her self assured inner beauty! (Yes, that even sounded stupid to me, but it WAS the. If stupidity were a disability, I know a few people who’d be getting monthly checks... You know you’re getting old when you can’t walk past a bathroom without thinking, “I might as well pee, as long as I’m here”.Pharmacist to a customer: “Sir, please understand, to buy an anti-depression pill you need a proper prescription ... Simply showing your marriage certificate and your wife’s picture is not enough.”A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman “Which book has helped you most in your life?”The woman replied, “My husband’s check book”“Political Correctness is just fascism pretending to be manners”—George CarlinMary Poppins, you’re under arrest for Supercallifragilisticsextrafficking.“And with that kiss, Sleeping Beauty woke up at last and immediately reached for the pepper spray.”“Hello, Suicide Hotline? It’s Eeyore again...”He was put into the CAT scanner. Unfortunately, the cat was still in it.After months of tests, doctors finally found what had caused his blindness..
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