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I don’t know if I would call it a retreat. More like a headlong run. I can’t connect anymore. People don’t make sense to me. All I know is that loving them can wound me, so it’s better to run. I think I loved Carl. That’s why I drove him away. Better to be the hated ex, the girl who cheated with his best friend, than the girl he fell in and then out of love with. I didn’t want to give him a piece of my heart to take away with him when we separated. Changes happen. People go their separate ways. Should I allow my body and spirit to go their separate ways? The body goes into the oven of course, no burial for me. Why make my relatives pay for a two thousand dollar box for worm fodder? I’d want my ashes to be scattered somewhere nice though. A river. Some place where the air is sweet and you can’t see any buildings through the trees. I want someone to pour a bottle of wine into the water, too, a final send-off as the last earthly bits of me slip downriver to the ocean. Now, as to what. She sighed when her phone began to ring. Her frustration went away when she saw Natalie's name on the screen."Hey Nat, what's up?" Not much, just wanted to see what you were up to," Natalie answered."I just got back from that 'Meet The Teachers' thing the school does and the new Drama teacher my God Nat she is drop dead gorgeous." What you got the hots for some old bag of a teacher now?" Not exactly here wait a second," Jenna said as she text the picture she had taken of Mia."Oh wow! Hey wait a second, I know this girl," Natalie said after receiving the picture."What? How?" Until a few weeks ago she danced at the club." You mean she stripped her way through college?" Yeah, hey let me ask you something. Do you want her?" Nat, before you called I was just starting to masturbate to her picture while thinking of the things I want to do to her." I don't mean just sexually, Jenna. Do you want her?" Oh you mean as like a slave! God yes, but even if she didn't tell the school board she was a.
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