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"Urge" is probably too soft a word. When the compulsion to cross-dresshit, I called it being "in the grip." When I was in the grip, thoughts ofwhat I would wear as a girl, and how I would look as a girl, consumed me.I oftened called getting en femme "girling," since I wasn't justdressing.I was normally able to quell the urge, out of deference to my wife, whomade it clear that she didn't understand or condone my "habit."But the grip had grabbed me, full force, the week before; and being astress zombie in the grip of a cross-dressing compulsion had led todaily, but thus far furtive, girling around the house.But the grip was still tightening, and it wanted more. I wanted more.I depilated what I could easily hide away in summer clothing. I shaved myarmpits daily. (My arms were naturally almost hairless.)This past week, I succumbed to a mad urge, and waxed my pubes bare, atwhich my wife raised a skeptical eyebrow. But she bought my explanationthat it was to keep crotch rot away in the. ’ Amber forced a chuckle. Lizzy looked scared. The way her eyes moved felt so uncomfortable. I wanted it to end. ‘Did you get some dinner?’ I asked, looking at Lizzy. She shook her head and then buried it back into her mother. ‘Well, that we might be able to fix,’ I said smiling, ‘you ever eat breakfast at night?’ She shook her head again, but this time she didn’t fall back into Amber. ‘I have eggs, bacon and cereal,’ I listed it on my fingers, ‘I can also make pancakes.’ Lizzy had no poker face. Her eyes lit up when I said pancakes. ‘I prefer pancakes myself,’ I lied. Amber smiled for real. It hit me with more force than I expected. I tried to ignore it. ‘Pancakes,’ Lizzy agreed, nodding her head. ‘Let’s eat, ‘ I said, tilting my head toward the house, ‘then you can show me what you’re making.’ Lizzy released her mom and started following me. Amber, smiling, followed after her. I had a strange feeling I was outnumbered. ‘You can call me Mark,’ I said when Lizzy caught up with.
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