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I had all the adrenaline but I felt safe." That didn’t bother you when you fucked Dean." I was safe enough with him, physically safe. With Jay knowing as well, neither of them could do anything terrible, they both had to see me at work with other people, but if I'd gone to some place with Tex... well anything could have happened." That's what scared me; that and... um..." Go on." Wondering." Wondering?" You know"She sat looking at me waiting, forcing the issue."I have a strategic kind of imagination, I can't help wondering about the long term as well as the moment. I couldn't help asking myself am I good enough? Is the rest of my life is going to be watching you in bars picking up men like Tex." I wondered that too... in a different way. I had to know.?"Know what?" If you'd still want me. Still want me if you knew what a slut I could be." That's what the doorway was all about? Pushing me?" Mmmm— disgusting wasn't it."I dug out my phone and found the pictures I'd taken as a car. She had been listening to older women chatting at the hairdressers about wife swapping and had been turned on by it. She eagerly told me all the gory details that she had heard and seeing that I was turned on as well, asked me if we should try it. Well the thought of being able to get my hands on lot’s of other women seamed a great idea. I hadn’t really thought about how I would feel seeing Helen with another man but my lust was up and all I could think of was all the fucking that I could be doing.Helen found out from some of the women at the hairdressers, how to go about finding other couples. A woman gave her a copy of a contact magazine and we where really excited as we looked through it, reading the ads and especially looking at all the nude photo’s. There was a photo of a beautiful girl of 18 with long blond hair and an absolutely fabulous figure. I was really keen to reply to this ad but Helen pointed out that the husband was in his 40's. Seeing how dejected I looked, Helen.
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