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I told you last night that I've always been extremely sexual. At times I've wondered if there was something wrong with me. That was part of what came up in therapy. The therapist ended up hitting on me. Then, I found out later, he'd not kept my confidence. I sicced the lawyers on everybody.I ramble. I'm sorry.The point is I am frustratingly sexual and really do feel it is impossible to act upon. I know some of my peers do not seem shy about acting on their desires, but if you notice, very few can transcend the stigma that attaches. Not if their artistic goals are similar to mine. Anyway, you, my dear friend, have allowed me to enjoy a little of what I cannot enjoy. Sex is best when shared, don't you agree. That's what it is all about.I promised you I would tell you about my private response to our sexy conversation. I'm not sure how to do that. I find myself shy. I do not want you to think bad of me, but somehow, I don't think you will. Just please know I'm giving you more trust than. ‘So?’ Ben began uncomfortably, ‘you, too?’ ‘Fuck,’ I exhaled plopping down on the couch, ‘I don’t fucking know.’ ‘You don’t know?’ Ben repeated slowly. I shook my head and placed it in my palms. ‘Are you…attracted to him?’ I nodded into my hands. ‘Well. Fuck me.’ Ben let out a long sigh. ‘Have you ever felt that way before? For someone else, I mean?’ ‘Hell, no!’ I replied sharply. ‘I don’t know what I feel now. Other than fucking confused,’ I finished weakly. ‘Maybe it’s a fluke. Ya know. Maybe it’s just because we fucked so many together?’ I mused. ‘What if it’s not?’ Ben asked. ‘We go from there,’ I said honestly. Prologue 4 I pulled up to the house and took a deep breath. ‘Here goes nothin’,’ I said to myself. I made my way inside and found Deak staring blankly at a muted TV show. ‘Hey,’ I said tentatively. He shot me a sideways look, ‘Hey.’ I plopped down on the other side of the couch and stared straight ahead. ”Bout earlier,’ Deak started, ‘I’m s…’ ‘Don’t,’ I cut him off..
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