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"I don't know, Sheri, I wish I did."We talked a while longer and then I helped her fix dinner. I couldn't eat. I couldn't get anything except cigarette smoke past the lump that closed off my emotions. I sat in the room all night, listening to the girls' quiet breathing as they slept in rolled out sleeping bags over an air mattress in my room. I didn't want them far from me. Maybe I was afraid that Colin would try to take them also away from me.The call was one of the hardest things I had to do. I was shaking so badly that I almost dropped the phone when he picked it up."Hello," his deep voice said."It's me." I tried to sound calm but I knew my voice shook."How are you?"The question caught me by surprise and it made me mad."How the hell do you think I am?" Kelly, you have to know that I didn't plan..."I interrupted his spiel, not interested in hearing it. "I want you out of the house. The girls and I will be back there tomorrow, which should give you time to get your stuff out and. My own tingling kept getting stronger and stronger until all of a sudden it blasted out from my crotch in all directions. That big thrill was called a “climax” or “orgasm” or “cumming”. I wanted more of them!When I got home I was on a high, “Ma! Guess what! I learned about fucking today!”I give my Ma a lot of credit for being cool. She sat me down and calmly asked, “So where did you learn this?”I spilled my story and she just quietly listened until I finished. I’ve got to admire her for being calm. She realized she’d not paid attention to how I was growing up, apparently figuring that way out here I’d be sheltered. No matter, now it had to be dealt with. She didn’t get mad at me for my ignorance but moved on to educating me. She didn’t want me to think sex was bad either, spoiling God’s gift. And she wisely praised my sharing with her, keeping the door open to help me.My dear Ma patiently explained what she knew about “baby making” and how to avoid pregnancy until you wanted it. I.
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