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”We hugged each other forever.Everyone else silently filed out of the roomand closed the door behind them.-----------------------------------------------------------------And now, THE TRUE STORY:All the names were changed.I loved cousin Susie to death. She lived a few minutes away.She was a swimmer and I loved wrestlingwith her and feeling her strength and her muscles as she pinned me down, fondled mytits and kissed me.We were lovers.Lisa, my next door neighbor, caught me spying on her a few times.It was July. Summer vacation.One day she struck up a conversation withme and I invited her in.mom was at work, my brothers were on one of their stupid fishing trips.We went to my room, I took out a brand new fifth of Stoli vodka.I went out to the kitchen for glasses, ice, a bottle of Perrier, cranberry juice, then buttered two keiser rollsand rejoined her.I was so excited at the thought of having a girlfriend.NO, a FRIEND girlfriend. You pervs :)“Old Russian secret.” I said “First we. The jeweller looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring.The man said “No, I’d like to see something a little more special”.At that statement, the jeweller went to his special stock and brought another ring over. “Here’s a stunning ring at only $40,000 the jeweller said.The lady’s eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement.The old man seeing this said “We’ll take it”.The jeweller asked how payment would be made and the man stated “By cheque. Now I know you need to make sure my cheque is good, so I’ll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and I’ll pick the ring up Monday afternoon”.On Monday morning, the jeweller angrily phoned the old man and said “There’s no money in that account!” “I know” said the old man “But let me tell you about MY GREAT WEEKEND!”As an ultimate test of his will power, a man decided to give up sex for Lent. Although not thrilled with the idea, his wife agreed to support him in this effort. The first few weeks.
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